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Why I Shop Alone: The Largest Grocery Bill Ever

March 15, 2013

We are supposed to have a system. That is, Patrick texts me a list of obscure ingredients on Monday afternoon, and on my way home I go to the store, and I locate and acquire said obscure ingredients so that he may cook for the week. Typically, at the end of the list is something like, “assorted meats,” which is a welcome line item for me because it means I can just grab whatever I see and get the heck out of there. My bill averages a little over $100 for any given trip.

Well, one long weekend recently, Colleen was visiting. Patrick was also off, and I had taken a floating holiday at work. We decided it would be fun for us all to go shopping and then for Pat to make lunch while we watched a movie (Note: The movie we watched, ‘Safety Not Guaranteed,’ was exceptional, you should watch it now). Anyway, this was perhaps the biggest mistake of my entire life. As I noted in a previous post, the times that Colleen visits me are usually pretty awesome. Of course I enjoy her company, but more importantly, when she is there Pat feels some sort of extra pressure to impress her, so he goes above and beyond. Also, she is a pretty damn special cook in her own right, so when they team up (with literally no help from me at all), our kitchen is where amazing happens (take that NBA!). However, when you get two food-enthusiasts shopping together, when they aren’t spending a dime, the damage, as you can imagine, can be staggering. Such was the case on this particular day.

While Colleen and Patrick ran through the supermarket like they were on some sort of 90’s game show, I sat in amazement as the high quality ingredients piled higher and higher. When we finally reached the cash register several hundred hours later (ok I’m exaggerating… a bit), I estimated the bill to be about $150, which would be a tough pill to swallow. I was wrong though, in fact, the final bill, after the discount of my Shaw’s card, came to a whopping $232, by far the most I had ever spent. Of course those two giddy school girls didn’t care as my shaking hand slid my debit card through the machine. They were just excited to get back and make smoothies and omelets. Now I know what being a parent must feel like. OK, I definitely don’t..

– Fin

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2 Comments
  1. haha, I can totally picture leen doing this.

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